Alright, I'm finally sitting down to write out a response to my own prompt. I've had kind of a rough week.
Some background: for the purposes of this theory I am assuming that a full successor to Nintendo Switch will be launched on November 1, 2024. Under this theory the system was delayed significantly from this fall to next due to an unforeseen circumstance (manufacturing, system revision, readiness of new software, success of current models, etc), and accordingly the software that would have constituted a "cross-gen" period will support it in its last year instead. This falls outside of the purview of my prompt but note that this means that after the Switch 2 launch there would be no more Switch 1 games published by Nintendo (besides Pokémon).
June 2023:
2023.06.01: Splatoon 3 season 4
2023.06.30: Everybody 1-2 Switch
- Pokémon Presents on ~June 14, featuring a remake of Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Explorers of Sky coming on September 8 and Detective Pikachu 2 coming in early 2024, as well as Pokémon DLC coming, uh, whenever it's supposed to be coming
- a Tweet ~June 20 confirms the fifth Mario Kart DLC wave coming on ~July 4
- financial meeting confirms new system coming next fiscal year
July 2023:
2023.07.04: Mario Kart 8 Deluxe Booster Course Pass Wave 5
2023.07.21: Pikmin 4
- A short (~12 minutes) Pikmin 4 Direct on ~July 6, sadly not featuring Hitoshi Matsumoto. Miyamoto and Hino appear though. I'm expecting enough editing to be called a Direct but no overarching voiceover or marketing copy style
August 2023:
2023.08.08: F-ZERO GXDX
- Nintendo Direct returns on ~August 8, featuring the shadowdrop of a remaster of F-ZERO GX. A far cry from the full remake of Metroid Prime, but still sufficiently enhanced for its 40 USD price. Physical copies would ship two weeks later. Also featured: Super Mario Bros. & Co., a new 2D Mario adventure in a visually impressive 3D style coming November 17; Rhythm Heaven Shuffle, a new game co-developed by EPD and indieszero coming on September 29; the next season of Splatoon and its Side Order expansion, both releasing on ~September 1; the final wave of Mario Kart 8 DLC coming "this fall," featuring the final Tour city track Kyoto Kart; Fire Emblem: Genealogy of the Holy War, a remake coming in early 2024; and Metroid Prime 4, mercifully arriving on October 20.
September 2023:
2023.09.01: Splatoon 3 season 5
2023.09.01: Splatoon 3: Side Order
2023.09.08: Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Explorers of Sky DX
2023.09.29: Rhythm Heaven Shuffle
- Nintendo Direct mini: Partner Showcase returns on September 19 to showcase whatever third party games are still coming to the system in its last year
October 2023:
2023.10.03: Mario Kart 8 Deluxe Booster Course Pass Wave 6
2023.10.20: Metroid Prime 4
- Wave 6, already detailed in the August Direct, is given the "available now" treatment on October 3
November 2023:
2023.11.17: Super Mario Bros. & Co.
- Nintendo's presence at The Game Awards the following month becomes known. Rumors of a Nintendo Switch 2 reveal start swirling.
December 2023:
2023.12.01: Splatoon 3 season 6
- On December 8, a special guest makes an appearance at The Game Awards: that's right, a spitting image Mii of Geoff Keighley, who is joined by a Mii of Hideo Kojima in the new game Tomodachi World, coming on March 22. This section is mercifully short, with more details said to be coming soon, but gamers worldwide are baffled and angered by this decision.
January 2024:
- First to go in our new twilight years paradigm is the beloved January game, which has been reserved for the anemic rest of the year (spoilers: it's Wind Waker)
- Detective Pikachu 2: Pika-2 is confirmed to launch on February 16, 2024
February 2024:
2024.02.16: Detective Pikachu 2: Pika-2
- Y'all know what time it is: Nintendo Direct returns on ~February 7. The games featured: The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker HD, adapted for Nintendo Switch and coming on April 26; Tomodachi World is shown in greater detail; the new Splatoon season is shown with a reminder that it is the penultimate season of new content; Fire Emblem is shown in greater detail and confirmed for May 24; bing bong, it's Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door HD, a loving remake by Intelligent Systems coming June 28; and finally, Donkey Kong Jungle Jamboree, a new 2D platformer by EPD Tokyo is revealed for "summer 2024." Note that Kirby is slightly dead due to the death of Vanpool and the greater development demands for the next 3D game.
March 2024:
2024.03.01: Splatoon 3 season 7
2024.03.22: Tomodachi World
April 2024:
2024.04.26: The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker HD
May 2024:
2024.05.24: Fire Emblem Genealogy of the Holy War
- On ~May 14, a "Splatoon 3 Finale Direct" is held detailing the final season, which features: more weapon kits than any previous season to reach one alternate kit for every main weapon, returning stage Ancho-V Games alongside the return of their in-universe arcade games, including the new Squid Beatz Ultimate; weapon license buybacks for players who have acquired every weapon kit in the game; and finally news hosted by the Squid Sisters in Inkopolis and Off the Hook in Inkopolis Square. Additionally, the final update in September and Final Fest are announced: the Final Fest, which bafflingly in-universe asks players whether Splatoon, Splatoon 2, or Splatoon 3 is best, will take place ~September 7 to ~September 9.
- Donkey Kong is unceremoniously confirmed for July 19 in a Tweet
June 2024:
2024.06.01: Splatoon 3 season 8
2024.06.28: Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door HD
- E3 is still dead. Sorry Dring.
- To my delight, the impending release of Paper Mario is completely overshadowed by a Tweet on ~June 10: "Tune in tomorrow at 9 AM PDT to learn about the future of Nintendo Switch." The following day "First look at Nintendo Switch 24" is uploaded to social media channels, showcasing a dramatically more powerful Nintendo Switch successor coming in fall of that year. The reveal teases new 3D Mario and Wave Race games similarly to the Nintendo Switch reveal. Nintendo promises that more details are forthcoming.
July 2024:
2024.07.19: Donkey Kong Jungle Jamboree
- Poor Donkey Kong. Thankfully, the full reveal event for Nintendo Switch 24 is held until after its release.
August 2024:
- A Nintendo Switch 24 digital event is held on ~August 1, formally revealing launch titles Super Mario Sandbox and Wave Race 24/7. Wave Race 24/7 features online play with time of day lighting accurate to the real world time and fictional location of a given course. The entire soundtrack is composed or co-composed by Totaka (!!!) and recorded by straight up fucking T-SQUARE. Also Mario has an open world but one smaller than that of games like GTA, Skyrim, or BOTW. The game instead focuses on density, verticality, and careful level design to create a robust platforming experience across the entire map. Cannons like those in Super Mario 64 showcase the new system's seamless world loading as a player shoots across a large swath of the map. A new Mario Kart, Mario Kart X, is shown and confirmed for a spring release. Also teased in the event is the next Animal Crossing game being in full development, a future Pikmin game being planned, and Star Fox nearing completion.
September 2024:
2024.09.01: Splatoon 3 version 9.0
- The Final Fest is epic, I fight valiantly for #TeamSplatoon
October 2024:
- It's marketing time for Nintendo Switch 24. We're talking Jimmy Fallon, preview events, Times Square billboards, and more. The Nintendo Switch is already a distant memory.
November 2024:
2024.11.01: Nintendo Switch 24
2024.11.01: Super Mario Sandbox
2024.11.01: Wave Race 24/7
December 2024:
- With two launch games, December is comfortably quiet.
Phew, that was exhausting. I promise the next prompt will be less laborious!